An interview with the Grandparents

Yesterday, my mother and I went into the nursing home where my grandparents live in Green Bay to catch up a little with them. My grandpa has bone, liver, and brain cancer, so I wanted to take advantage of the oportunities I have to chat with him. Here's a little snippit of how it went:

Me: Hi guys, did you get the Christmas card I sent?

Grandma: Hey, do you still work at the tavern?

Mom: No, ma, that was Michelle (my sister). I think that she still works there, but she mainly works at the mall right now.

Grandma: Oh yeah... Michelle. Gosh - she's so pretty. She could be a movie star!

Grandpa: What? What's that?

Grandma: Michelle - Jean's other daughter. She's pretty.

Grandpa: Oh.

Me: Grandma, did you get my card that I sent?

Grandma: Oh yes, we got that. I can't write any cards out because I have tennis elbow, except in my fingers. Laura! If you ever get that GET THE OPORATION! I didn't, and now I can't do any of the crafts that they want us to do here. But, they're stupid anyway.

Grandpa: What?

Grandma: We're talking about Christmas cards.

Grandpa: Oh....

Grandma: That's why I always wanted to die at 60. Do you remember that Jean?

Mom: Yup - Laura remembers that too. Don't you, Laura?

Me: Uh huh. When we were kids you always told us to enjoy you now because you'd be dead within the year.

Grandma: Yeah. That would have been nice. Now, next year I'm going to be 90! Remember, just throw me in the ditch when I die. There's a good one right over there.

Grandpa: Hey - is it cold out right now?

Mom: No, Dad. Its not too bad. Its like 35 degrees.

(Grandpa makes a face.)

Me: So, I'm glad that you guys are liking it here. Grandma, I'm happy that you've made friends here.

Grandma: Yeah. I have to watch out, though. Some of these old people just go on forever and ever about their families. I avoid them. I mean, who the hell wants to hear about other people's families?! That's crap.

Mom: Oh, do you talk about us ever?

Grandma: No. I try not to.

Mom: Ok. (smiles)

Grandma: Yeah, I like to have friends. This one (points to Grandpa) isn't that good to talk to anymore.

Grandpa: What?

Grandma: You're loosing it. Last week you tried to walk around naked.

Grandpa: No, I only do that if they pay me. (winks)

Grandma: Hey Laura - do you have a boyfriend?

Me: No - last time I spoke with you, you told me to not get married until 28. Remember? I'm just trying to follow you're advise.

Grandma: Yeah, that's the way to do it. But, I don't know about guys now-a-days. Everytime you see them, they're wearing earings and necklaces. I even saw one with a bracelet! I don't like these guys now. Don't date any of those ones.

Me: I think that there still are some good ones out there.

(Grandma just shrugs)

It pretty much went on like that for a while. My grandma always tries to give away whatever she has. This time, she gave me a quilt that her mother made and her box of change that she won at bingo. She tried to give me more, but I refused. They're sweet people, and fun to talk to. Well, I'm sure I'll see them again soon.