The Bottle Effect

Hello. I realize that I haven't posted anything in quite a while. The truth is, I've been waiting for something strange and exciting to happen, so that I can talk it up here. But, I just have to come to terms with the fact that I'm a rather boring person, most days.

So, in the aim of keeping this blog alive, I'm going to regail you all with another one of my highly thought-out and sophisiticated social theories. This one's call "The Bottle Effect".

I hear that the term "Bottle-Effect" has already been used for something or other in the science world. But no matter! My theory marches on. Catch the wave, won't you?


The Bottle Effect has to do with men wanting to date women, and women wanting to date men. It also has to deal with the women who don't want to date those men, and the men who don't want to date those women. It helps to throw a little light on why some people decide they want to date people who don't want to date them back.

As we go through life, we inevitably find ourselves in different social circles. We may hang with one group of people for happy hour each week, another for Bible study, and yet another to watch "24". These different groups, for purposes of this study, will now be known as "bottles".

In this world, there are billions of people, most not suitable for dating. There's a variatble "ocean" of folks who have nothing wrong with them - they might even be quite attractive. They're "just not the right person for you." Now, when choosing whom a person would like to date, its important to keep in mind certain factors, like attraction, religious affiliation, life-goals, blah blah blah. What I'm saying, is that we all have a long list of things that we're looking for, or are most compatible with. That's all well and good.

However, when that "certain someone" doesn't come along for a seemingly long period of time, there is a great temptation to "take stock" of your friends, co-workers, and anyone you just happen to spend time with. We tend to size them up, compare them, and see which one best fits the "shopping list" that we have for ourselves. Often, this can lead to a forced (although it might not feel like that) desire to court someone, that if we were looking at the bigger picture, we would not necessarily choose to date.

Get it? Normally, we would recognise a whole ocean of choices, and wait for someone who best suits us (and us, them). However, people often take a bottle and scoop out some of the water from the ocean, and concentrate all their attention on the people in the bottle. They've gone from looking within an ocean of choices, to a small bottle. This often results in people liking people who don't like them.

Yes, I know that you can't really fall in love with someone "out there in the world", but instead need to know them and have them be in a circle of yours. I'm not saying otherwise. What I'm saying (in this critically acclaimed theory) is that when The Bottle Effect is in play in your life, you're comparing all the people you hang with and are selecting the one that most resembles what you want. But, I believe that the person you're supposed to be with should be incomparable. (Now, everone take a big, girly, dreamy-eyed sigh... good.)

So there you go. The Bottle Effect. Lean from it and stop making people around you uncomfortable by starring at them all throughout happy hour. No one likes that.